FEAR
“Fear is the energy that activates my character defects.”
Read that one again.
“Fear is the energy that activates my character defects, Sometimes my shortcomings lie dormant like a bumper-car ride with the electricity off, and I don’t even notice them. When I’m afraid, however, my fear acts like a charge that causes the cars (my defects) to start moving. I spend my mental and physical energy running in circles, trying not to get bumped or run over.”
-Courage to Change
What triggers fear?
Here’s a few ideas:
Trying to control things we can’t control
Worrying about the future and not staying in the present
“What’s if’s”
Dwelling on mistakes made in the past
Worrying about other’s opinion of you
Isn’t that an interesting thought? Fear causes our character defects to come to life! Anger is usually a reaction from fear. Most reactions we aren’t proud of can be traced to fear.
I remember when I was little, my sister and I ended up home alone during a tornado warning. We had to go down to the basement by ourselves. I’m sure it wasn’t very long. But I remember it so clearly.
After that I became a professional weather watcher. I wouldn’t go anywhere if there was even a chance of a thunderstorm. I wouldn’t play with neighbors, I wanted to be as close to home and my parents as possible. My fear crippled me.
That’s another thing fear does. It stops us from enjoying life because we are worried about what might happen. Most of the things we fear…never come to pass.
I do believe in God, a Higher Power, and I do trust Him. But I have found in my emotional and spiritual journey that sometimes I need concrete actions to help me move past something.
Some things that help me when I stop and realize that fear is at the root of an issue or a reaction:
-Take deep breaths. Breathing is a powerful weapon against fear.
-Pray
-Think about what is actually happening in this present moment.
-Ask myself “Am I safe right now?” Most likely the answer is yes.
-Apologize if I realize I messed up or overreacted because deep down I was afraid.
-Talk to a therapist to work through what I fear.
We all deal with fear. But realizing when it is fear that is driving us can help to slow us down, to breath, to think about our reaction, and to choose our next steps.
