Like Wildflowers
“The world breaks everyone and afterwards many are strong at the broken places.”
-Ernest Hemingway
“Recovery does not mean immunity or exemption from problems; recovery means learning to face and solve problems, knowing they will appear regularly.”
-The Language of Letting Go
In March of 2018 I went to a place called Onsite. I call it adult therapy camp. It’s right outside of Nashville on a gorgeous farm. I stayed in the beautiful mansion built in the 1800’s that is the centerpiece of the property. There were about 50 people there that week, and we were broken into groups of 8 or 9. Each group was assigned a therapist, and they told us about 6 months of therapy happens during the course of a week there. It was amazing and hard and excruciating and life changing and beautiful all at once.
Life will give us problems. It will give us things that break us. Some of us learn to deny those things. Some of us think we must have done something wrong to deserve these “bad things” happening in our lives. Some of us stuff the hard down, so far we can’t seem to feel the good or the bad. Some of us act out and get angry. Some of us medicate to numb out.
But we all have hard. In December of 2018 a lot of things started to crumble in my life. My marriage was shaky, our finances were shaky, my life felt shaken! I felt out of control and panicked. It was all very scary and very hard. Problems were popping up like wildflowers…. and I couldn’t push them away. I faced the fact that I needed help dealing with all of it. My husband went to Onsite first, and was so changed, that I went the next month.
I still stay in touch with my group from Onsite. We have monthly zoom calls and almost daily group texts. The therapist we were assigned was amazing and I began to learn how to deal with some of the problems in my life. Did everything magically disappear? Nope. I don’t think that’s how life works. But for the first time I had the right tools to deal with the problems.
I don’t know if I’m there yet, but I hope I can say that I’m strongest in the places I’ve been broken. I believe I will say that.
You might need to hear today that you’re not the only one who feels problems crashing in. I encourage you to find the tools to face them. I encourage you to find a therapist, or a book, or a bible study, or a friend who has walked through something similar, or a support group. But know everyone faces problems.
If we do the work, face the pain, learn to heal, learn boundaries and how to love and care for ourselves so we can then love out of a healthy place, if we don't hide and numb…..I BELIEVE we become the strongest in those areas that tried to break us!
If you’re interested in Onsite i’ve linked the website here!
